Thursday, September 10, 2015

Trashy Shorts: Stink Bug

Yesterday, I was able to pop over to my younger son's preschool to have lunch with him and then hang out for a few minutes on the playground with him and his class.

As I sat at a picnic table chatting with my son's teacher, one of the little guys in his class squealed in delight. We looked to where he was pointing at a bug crawling across a log.

"It's a stink bug!" my son's classmate informed us excitedly.  "They're called that because they will toot on you!"

I was so enthralled by this that I started craning my neck to get a better look at the bug.  I wondered, briefly, if my ass--somewhat famously known for passing gas that smells strangely like mildew--smelled worse than the stink bug's and if there was a way to discreetly find out.

Any dreams of possible scientific experiments were forgotten, though, when my son looked up at me, a puzzled expression on his face.  I immediately understood.

"'Toot' means to fart, buddy," I clarified.  "It's called a stink bug because it will fart on you."

My son raised his eyebrows and nodded in comprehension, then he let out his own little giggle before sidling up closer to the log to get a better look at the stink bug.  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his teacher studying me, so I turned to look at her.

"You keep it real classy at your house, don't you, Shay?"

I gave a self-satisfied smile.  "I try, you know?  I try."


  1. You can dress it up and tie a ribbon around it, but a fart's still a fart.
    Not literally.
    My favourite joke is fart.

  2. "You keep it real classy at your house, don't you, Shay?"**


    I can see you have a great relationship w/ your son's teacher!!!